Let Go of Comparisons
to Have Ethical Success
By Lee Jampolsky, Ph.D.
all strive for success in both our personal and professional lives.
Unfortunately, we often rely on others for that “feeling” of
success, or for their opinions or approval before we truly feel
we’ve made it. However, we each control our own success. Whether
under conscious control or not, our thoughts determine our success or
failure every minute of every day.
business and career growth is your goal, then you must change your
mindset and not just your behavior. This requires a willingness to
stop thinking in ways that create obstacles, and start thinking in
ways that overcome them. One sign that reveals if you are creating
obstacles for yourself is if you make too many comparisons.
you want to create “ethical success,” then you need to reclaim and
develop the power of thought. Begin developing the one force that
creates true success: the desire to leave the world a better place
than you found it. For example, when you are aware of co-workers or
competitors less fortunate than you, be grateful that you can both
enjoy your success and truthfully wish them well; perhaps you can even
do something to help with their condition. This is a very different
business approach than the usual “dog eat dog” mindset. Similarly,
when you see those who seem to have more than you, be happy for their
good fortune rather than envious. This positive attitude will help you
have a greater chance for success.
Let go of comparison as a way of
functioning in business. Two guaranteed ways to set your business or
career on a disastrous course are: 1) to compare and then be envious
of those who have good fortune, and 2) to ignore those less fortunate
or use them to make yourself feel lucky. Rather, if you wish to set
your business or career on a positive course, you shouldn’t make
comparisons. You should be happy for those who have good fortune and
help someone in need or less fortunate than yourself, perhaps by
becoming a mentor.
Success in business comes largely from
your beliefs and attitudes. Adopt the following beliefs and attitudes
to let go of comparisons and become ethically successful:
“True success makes no comparisons and excludes no one. Today I
commit to the practice of this truth.”
you remember that you’re here not only for your own success, but
also to help others, the positive attitudes of open-mindedness,
cooperation, prosperity, and kindness develop. These are also
self-perpetuating. A positive attitude is impossible to adopt when you
believe you are a victim or when you make constant comparisons, and a
posture of rigid defensiveness will surely follow. Instead, commit to
eliminating the habit of comparing everyone and everything. By doing
so, you won’t have to “try” to be ethically successful; it will
simply follow as you practice this lesson.
yourself as ethically successful, with your accomplishments not being
entirely separate from others, creates gratitude for each and every
person on your team, as well as your customers. This is how the
self-sustaining cycle of ethical success comes into being. All of the
comparisons between yourself and others have done nothing but delay
the success and dynamic peace that are available to you at all times.
The stressors that hatred, jealousy, and resentment create do not
exist when comparisons are laid aside.
“Today I pledge to lay comparisons aside. Instead, I choose to be
helpful and want success for all around me. I am grateful I can do
this, I am grateful each time I do it, and I know there is no
situation in which this cannot be done.”
today that you lack nothing in order to create ethical success. You
can deny this and choose to give energy to anger, malice, and revenge.
Or you can just as easily choose to have gratitude for the
opportunities you presently have and will have. When you are tempted
to fall back on comparisons, remember this next belief:
3. “There is another choice. I choose gratitude for opportunity,
no matter how small.”
and success occupy the same mind and build upon each other. Similarly,
anger, jealousy, hatred, envy, and fear can crowd your thoughts, and
they, too, build upon each other. Gratitude is an aspect of ethical
success. It is a doorway that allows you to find opportunity rather
than obstacles. Today, remind yourself many times of the following
4. “Letting go of comparisons is the way to true gratitude and
you become accustomed to looking to other people for gratification,
gratitude, and validation? Do you attempt to be compassionate, kind,
and forgiving, but stop if you don’t get validation from others? You
may find yourself returning to your old fear-based ways when you
don’t get the responses you expect.
5. “Only my own gratitude
to others for validation is simply your ego talking. This originates
in the belief that your happiness is dependent on the outside approval
of others. This is a very limiting belief to your success and the
success of your business.
6. “Every positive thought and action I bring to my company
concerned with who you are right now, not what you have or have not
done in the past. This way you can eliminate negative thoughts or
emotions you may have about the past. Be grateful for your capacity to
create ethical success by directing your thoughts. This is a profound
and useful gift that is always available to you.
practicing these beliefs and placing an emphasis on being kind to
people, both in thought and action, you can achieve ethical success.
This does not mean that you let people walk all over you or lose your
competitive edge. Allow your thoughts of success to expand to all the
people in your life. Want the best for all, including yourself and
your company. Remember that when you are defensive and afraid, you
have nothing, but when you are kind with a grateful heart, you have
everything. It is then that you can be truly ethically successful.
[This article is an edited excerpt from the book
Walking Through Walls: Practical Spirituality for an Impractical
World, by Lee Jampolsky, Ph.D.]
Read other articles and learn more
about Dr. Lee Jampolsky.
[This article is available at no-cost, on a non-exclusive basis.
Contact PR/PR at 407-299-6128 for details and